The Cringe of Cringe Town is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Dwayne Johnson with an iron fist, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, compulsory vegetarianism, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.145 billion Rock Worshippers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cringe Hut. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 79.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Cringe economy, worth 758 trillion Pesos a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 147,474 Pesos, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 615,346 per year while the poor average 23,070, a ratio of 26.7 to 1.

The derisively named "Morlocks of Moria" futilely demand time in the sun, the government is suspected of mass disappearing dissidents both at home and abroad, colonial subjects have Cringe culture shoved down their throats, and no personal detail is too tiny for the suede-denim census police. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Cringe Town's national animal is the Rock, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Rock.

Cringe Town is ranked 268,922^nd in the world and 375^th in United Kingdom for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -9.49 on the Clooney Contribution Index.